Saturday, August 17, 2013

Shoes Part 2

On the third day of second grade, Owen cut the laces off his new shoes.  Initially he claimed that the laces came untied and he simultaneously stepped on them all and they broke off.  Then the story changed to the laces just broke off in his hands as he was trying to unknot them.  Finally, he admitted to cutting them with scissors when he could not get the knots out even with the teachers help.  

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

The Shoe

Owen "accidentally" kicked his shoe onto the roof of  the babysitter's neighbor's two-story home.  He says he was just walking and because the shoe was loose it flew right off his foot and landed up there.  

Boy Talk

Over heard as the boys were hurdling the arm of the couch:
Owen:  It's training for your nuts.
Jay: So you can jump over pointy fences?
Owen: Yeah.

Saturday, May 11, 2013


Jay wore jeans to field day at school.  He said he didn't care if they got messed up but he didn't want his sweat pants to get ruined. 

Is There Ever a Reason?

Owen:  Mommy, Jay farted on my wrestler for no reason!


Me: Owen, if your brother jumped off a bridge would you jump too?
Owen:  Yes, I can swim.


I was working with Jay on a fraction word problem.  Quinton ate 1/4 of a pizza.  Abe at 1/2.  Who ate more?  
Me: Would you rather have half a pizza or a fourth? 
Jay: a fourth, I'm not that hungry.  

What the Easter Bunny Brings Naughty Boys

Owen came into the living room breathing heavily and holding his stomach.  When I asked him what's wrong, he said he had a bad feeling he was getting bunny turds and rotten eggs for Easter. 

Saturday, April 6, 2013

How to Underestimate Your Child's Potential

Me: Jay, did you draw a picture of yourself in jail?
Jay: No, it's the White House. 

What Does Being a Grandmother Mean?

Owen: You have grandchildren.
Jay: You're fat and old.